I’ve been thinking a lot about giving recently. In other words, I’ve been experiencing how the simple giving of our attention—not of gifts or any other highly coveted thing, but of our own undivided open-eared presence—is perhaps THE ultimate act of generosity. Our attention is indeed a powerful show of selflessness, whether we’ve given it wholly to a pet, a loved one, a colleague, or someone we barely know.

My husband and I have just returned from a holiday together without the kids. I realized while we were away that one of the most special and important things in any relationship is in providing one’s complete attention to whatever another is going through or needing to articulate. I seriously think that most of us are starved of this very basic, very poignant experience from day to day: the experience of giving and receiving full and supportive attention.

How about you? Do you feel you give conscious, affectionate attention to yourself and others on a regular basis? We have all heard the adage that giving is the greatest gift of all. I would like to expand on this by saying that the giving of our true, bright, and open attention is the greatest gift, because it invites us to clear away the debris and fall into the intensity and wonder of the moment at hand.

Now imagine giving this same attention to your partner in love or work, to your super-needy friend, your kids, or whomever else you brush up against. What happens to us when we fall into these states of generous spirit is enormously profound, and it doesn’t cost a thing. I guess in truth we might simply call this magnanimous and beaming flow of attention love, and when we get right down to it, isn’t that what full-on giving is essentially made of?